What is your favorite place to go in your city?
I used to live in Pasadena for years. We lived in a small condo that we outgrew, but we loved our location so much, we couldn’t move. Everything was walking distance. Target was a block north, Trader Joe’s was a block south. If we wanted to shop or eat dinner, restaurants and stores were a block east. On a sunny spring day, it was about a mile stroll west into Old Town. On the weekends, I walked to a nearby Starbucks for coffee and leisurely read the Sunday paper. During the Rose Parade, I rolled out of bed and headed up the street to watch the floats go by. I love a walking neighborhood.
For years we thought about moving to a bigger place, but our location anchored us to stay. We eventually made the difficult decision to move. That was such a perfect location to live, if only our place was a little bigger.
The theme of staying came to mind while writing this morning. It made me think about the coffeehouse song Stay by Lisa Loeb. The only relation this song has to today’s prompt is the title. Funny how at certain moments a single word can seem so powerful. This song has nothing to do with the moving or leaving home, yet it continues to play in a loop in my head. Stay.
Here’s a few interesting things about the song.
Long before this song became a hit, Loeb performed it at her shows, where it got a great response and was one of her most requested songs. Said Loeb: “I usually write songs that are more fictional, and for some reason when I sat down to write that song, I let myself write more about how I was feeling at that moment. And that’s something I think about a lot as I continue to write music, that the songs that I write that are more personal and without as much editing, are the ones that people connect to more.”
Regarding the lyrics, “I turned the radio on, I turned the radio up, and this woman was singing my song,” Lisa explains: “That was when you hear somebody telling your exact story. It’s funny, because it wasn’t until later, after a couple of major breakups, that I realized when you’re depressed and you’re going through these breakups, the breakup was supposed to happen. If you’re going through difficult times, it’s hilarious how you turn on the radio and even the most cliché things perfectly capture how you’re feeling. And then you realize why people wrote those songs. When you’re not going through some of those things, sometimes as a songwriter you think, “Oh, that’s so straightforward and cliché,” but you know what? That’s how it feels. In a way I think I wrote that into the song because I was relating my story to the effect that everybody goes through this. I’m not so special. You know, this isn’t such a special situation that I’m going through, but it still means something to me. And it might not be as depressing as my friend who’s suicidal, but it’s still really hard. Hopefully, as a listener, you get a feeling like when you just can’t get away from your problems. You leave your house, you’re driving down the road, you’re going to do something different, and all of a sudden you hear, Oh, here’s my story on the radio. It’s like the last thing I need to hear right now.”
Maybe we are never meant to stay in one place, no matter how perfect it may seem. And do we ever really leave entirely anyway? There always is a piece that remains with us no matter how far we go. Thinking this way makes leaving a little bit easier.
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You say I only hear what I want to You say I talk so all the time. So? And I thought what I felt was simple And I thought that I don't belong And now that I am leaving Now I know that I did something wrong 'cause I missed you Yeah, I missed you And you say I only hear what I want to: I don't listen hard I don't pay attention to the distance that you're running to anyone, anywhere I don't understand if you really care I'm only hearing negative: no, no, no (bad) So I, I turned the radio on, I turned the radio up And this woman was singin' my song: The lover's in love and the other's run away Lover is crying 'cause the other won't stay Some of us hover when we weep for the other who was Dying since the day they were born Well. Well, this is not that: I think that I'm throwing, but I'm thrown And I thought I'd live forever, but now I'm not so sure You try to tell me that I'm clever But that won't take me anyhow, or anywhere with you You said that I was naive And I thought that I was strong I thought, "Hey, I can leave, I can leave." Oh, but now I know that I was wrong, 'cause I missed you Yeah, I missed you You said you caught me 'cause you want me And one day you'd let me go You try to give away a keeper, or keep me 'cause you know you're just so scared to lose And you say, "Stay." And you say I only hear what I want to
I always thought it would be so cool to live in a place where you could walk to everything. I imagine that would be hard to give up. We live in a pretty perfect spot right now. It’s not entirely walkable. Although there are people who live here who don’t own cars. Technically you can walk to everything you need because there is a huge greenway right next to the neighborhood that goes all the way downtown. Most people bike, but several walk. We think about moving into a slightly larger home, but this location is hard to beat. We couldn’t afford a regular sized home here.
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I like the thought of a greenway leading to downtown. Sounds like a nice location
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We live in the suburbs and have to drive everywhere. 🙄 I was just telling my husband that I wish we lived in a smaller town so we could walk more. We actually walked to church yesterday because the weather was beautiful and it was only a mile away.
Love this song! Brings back so many memories. Also, love how you said that we never really leave a place. We take a piece of it with us no matter how far away we go. So true!
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A mile walk is a nice distance. I now live in the suburbs, too. Even though we are not able to walk like our old neighborhood, I like it as well
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love the song! and your old condo sounds amazing … i’d miss it too.
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That place does sound really nice. But all good things must end, so they say.
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Yes, they do. And that’s ok, too
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Hey, we should probably have traded homes… ours is in a cool walking neighbourhood but a bit bigger house than we need nowadays! 😉
I haven’t heard this song in many years and it reminds me of a time that was overwhelming in many ways with complicated relationships, early parenthood, and finding my way as a stay-at-home dad (which I did for three years – busiest job ever!). And yeah, what I’d hear on the radio would often be so relatable to what was going on in my life… Sometimes I’d just stop the car and write down thoughts. Those places and feelings are all stored inside, often unlocked by a song. Thanks for this post!
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I like that you’d stop the car to write down thoughts. That’s pretty cool. I may have to try that
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Yeah, sometimes the best thoughts can be fleeting, gone in an instant!
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Ethan Hawke directed the music video for “Stay.”
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Thanks. I didn’t know that. I know they used it for Reality Bites, so that makes sense
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Love a walking neighborhood. My one and only time to visit Pasadena I remember seeing people outdoors all over the place walking, jogging, playing frisbee, a beautiful cool little town.
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It’s nice to be outdoors during springtime and summer. It is a cool little town.
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