I was listening to a podcast the other day and discovered an interesting interview. Typically, I listen to this particular podcast for personal finance and investing topics. The title of this episode was different and caught my eye: Your Blueprint For Life’s Toughest Challenges.
Hal Eldor faced many challenges in his life and somehow managed to remain positive and thrive despite these serious setbacks. One of the methods he discusses is the five minute rule. Here are a few snippets.
When something goes wrong, its OK to be negative. It’s OK to feel sorry for yourself. But there’s no sense on dwelling on something that you can’t go back in time to change. Doing so only creates suffering. Every painful emotion that we have ever experienced is self created by our resistance to our reality. It’s the degree that we wish or want something more different than what is out of our control that creates emotional pain.
It’s OK to be negative, but not more than 5 minutes. Set the timer for 5 minutes and fully feel the emotions and don’t suppress them.
Start practicing the 5 minute rule now. You might need 10, or 15 or 20 minutes. You might have to snooze the 5 minutes multiple times. But every time you do, you are elevating your consciousness to a place of awareness that you are in control of your emotions.
If I can get over it in 20 minutes, then I can probably can get over it in 15. Maybe even in 10. Then 5.
You can’t change reality so be at peace with it. We get to choose how we experience every moment in life.
– Hal Eldor
I have a tendency to be inside my head unnecessarily. I replay awkward moments, words that were said or perceived missteps over and over. It can be self-inflicted torture sometimes. Fortunately, I don’t hold on to it very long. Maybe 24 hours, up to a week at most. Occasionally, I’ll have a random flashback months later that makes me shudder. But Eldor is right. Life doesn’t have a rewind button and we can’t change what has already occurred. What’s done is done. We just have to accept it, be at peace that we cannot change it and then move on. If I can get this done in five minutes, I’d save myself days of self-inflicted pain.
In my craziness, I know that I’m usually blowing things out of proportion. That’s just something I do. Nobody is giving the moment a second thought but me. The funny thing is, I understand the reality of the situation, but my pathway is blocked by emotions: fear, embarrassment, perfectionist’s shame or disappointment. Logically I know it’s not a big deal, but I’ve always accepted as fact that I can’t help the way I feel. So I let myself feel the emotions until it’s all drained out. But Eldor is suggesting an alternative path. I get to choose how I feel. I’m in control to make a choice, instead of the situation controlling me. It never occurred to me that this was ever an option.
So, a five minute timer, huh? I can give this a try. This is what I could do differently. As luck would have it, I started wearing a watch again last week. It’s been three years since I last wore one. Coincidence or just good timing?
I stumbled upon a song on YouTube many years ago and loved the beat and positive theme. Matisyahu released One Day in 2009 and this verse says it all.
Sometimes in my tears I drown
But I never let it get me down
So when negativity surrounds
I know someday it’ll all turn around
This song has gotten me out of so many horrible, demon filled times. Thank you for putting this song out for the world to find peace in. I know its worked for me.
YouTube comment by scotthumphrey7495
I also stumbled upon a random live cover version by Bigoy Drilon. It has more of an island feel and I like his interesting take on the vocals. You know me, I always like a good cover. Cheers!
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For a complete playlist, please click here.
For the Spotify playlist, please click here.
Sometimes I lay
Under the moon
And thank God I'm breathing
Then I pray
Don't take me soon
'Cause I am here for a reason
Sometimes in my tears I drown
But I never let it get me down
So when negativity surrounds
I know some day it'll all turn around because...
All my life I've been waiting for
I've been praying for
For the people to say
That we don't wanna fight no more
There will be no more wars
And our children will play
One day [6x]
It's not about
Win or lose
'Cause we all lose
When they feed on the souls of the innocent
Blood-drenched pavement
Keep on moving though the waters stay raging
In this maze you can lose your way (your way)
It might drive you crazy but don't let it faze you, no way (no way)
Sometimes in my tears I drown (I drown)
But I never let it get me down (get me down)
So when negativity surrounds (surrounds)
I know some day it'll all turn around because...
All my life I've been waiting for
I've been praying for
For the people to say
That we don't wanna fight no more
There will be no more wars
And our children will play
One day [6x]
One day this all will change
Treat people the same
Stop with the violence
Down with the hate
One day we'll all be free
And proud to be
Under the same sun
Singing songs of freedom like
One day [4x]
All my life I've been waiting for
I've been praying for
For the people to say
That we don't wanna fight no more
There will be no more wars
And our children will play
One day [6x]
This song gave me chills…your post hit a nerve….thank you for both.
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It’s a great song. I’m glad I randomly stumbled upon it.
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One Day, indeed 🙏🏼☮️
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Nice song… good life hack. I hope it works for you. ^_^
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I’ve decided to embrace the fact that most days you post amazing songs that I have somehow never heard and they are a great accompaniment to your posts. Good stuff.
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Thanks, Susan. I appreciate your thoughts. That means a lot.
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What a great idea! I’ve been working this year to feel uncomfortable emotions instead of stuffing them down inside. I love the idea of setting a timer and then just letting go.
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The timer sounds challenging, but I’m going to give it a shot. Wishing you growth in 2024!
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Thank you! Hope your 2024 is healthy and happy!
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Thank you! You, too!
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I like the idea of a 5 minute rule!
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Me, too!
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Oh man, we’re so alike! Great process, will give it a whirl.
Nice song… I don’t think I’d heard it before though something about it seems familiar.
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If you try it, hope it helps!
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5 min rule! I’ll try it. Thank you for sharing! 🌷
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