So, this new car is teaching me a few small lessons. Nothing groundbreaking, but there are always lessons to be found if you look hard enough.
After I bought my car, I decided to sell the old one. I looked up the Kelley Blue Book value and it ranged between $3,000 to $6,000. Not bad for my old ride. I didn’t want to hassle with finding a buyer or taking time to meet and show it so I went to Carmax. I knew I wasn’t going to get top dollar, but was hoping for an offer at least near the bottom range of the scale. They offered 1,700 bucks. My initial reaction was feeling ripped off. I never like it when I think someone is trying to take advantage of me. I’m not saying I was pissed, but I was right on the border of it. As I drove home, my father’s voice came into my head.
Calm down. Think logically about this. Don’t let emotions cloud your judgement.
My car was in great shape. The interior and exterior are both in great condition. But then other facts began to settle in. I’m going to confess a crazy piece of information here. My car was 18 years old (crazy, right?) with 170,000 miles on it. I’ve never kept a car this long before. Working from home really extended the life of my car. Sure, there are a few things they would have to do before selling it. Let’s call that about a grand in work. Tacking that on brought the new tally to $2,700. That puts me just under the low end of my imaginary scale. My time and energy are worth something. I can’t put a price on that. Plus, they have to make a profit. OK, maybe not an unreasonable price. I turned over the keys that week.
I’m sitting at the dealership right now. The tire pressure of one of my tires is really low. The car is three weeks old, so I figured whatever the issue, it should be covered. As I sat across from the service representative, my blood pressure began to rise when he explained that tires are not included under the warranty. If it was a defective tire, I’d have to go through the manufacturer. If it was a puncture, they could patch it up. The difference in cost of the two was $40 versus $400. Maintenance expenses already for a brand new car?
Then I heard my dad’s voice again. Relax. Think it through. What if I ran over a nail? That’s on me. If it’s defective, get a new tire and just file a claim. Pain in the ass, but a good chance it would be covered. And when I thought about it, it’s reasonable that tires aren’t covered under warranty. I smiled, shook the guy’s hand. Let’s get it done. After about a thirty minute wait, I found out it’s just a patch up job. Maybe dialing it down a bit inched karma to my side.
I’m always looking for silver linings. I like the fact that I still hear my father’s voice. I’m over 50 years old and he’s still there to guide me. At my age, some things are not worth getting upset about. Once I wade through my initial emotional response, most times the other side is not completely off base. It’s just a matter of choice how I choose to react. I just needed a reminder. Thanks, dad.
I looked up songs that help to keep you calm. I found this list: 10 Songs That Help Us Stay Calm When We Feel Stressed. I liked the story that accompanied James Taylor’s Carolina In My Mind.
“I am a person with high anxiety and I recently read that singing can quickly change your stress levels or alter your negative ‘down the rabbit hole’ thinking. I walk or bike daily to help me relax and breathe and one afternoon out of the blue I started to sing James Taylor’s ‘Carolina In My Mind’ while I’m doing it. Although I don’t know all the words, I just carry on regardless with the verses I do know. It has been transformative in changing my feelings, and my spirits lift immediately. The minute I hit the sidewalk I start singing and surprise myself by how automatically the lyrics have become a mantra.”
Gail Forrest, humor writer and stand up comic
Food for thought. I just might give this a try. I’ve always liked James Taylor, so that’s a plus. It’s just too bad I can’t carry a tune.
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For a complete playlist, please click here.
For the Spotify playlist, please click here.
In my mind I'm going to Carolina. Can't you see the sunshine, can't you just feel the moonshine?
Ain't it just like a friend of mine to hit me from behind? Yes, I'm going to Carolina in my mind.
Karen she's the silver sun, you best walk her way and watch it shine,
watch her watch the morning come.
A silver tear appearing now I'm crying, ain't I? I'm going to Carolina in my mind.
There ain't no doubt in no ones mind that loves the finest thing around,
whisper something soft and kind.
And hey, babe, the sky's on fire, I'm dying, ain't I? I'm going to Carolina in my mind.
In my mind I'm going to Carolina. Can't you see the sunshine, can't you just feel the moonshine?
Ain't it just like a friend of mine to hit me from behind? Yes, I'm going to Carolina in my mind.
Dark and silent late last night, I think I might have heard the highway calling.
Geese in flight and dogs that bite.
And signs that might be omens say I'm going, going I'm gone to Carolina in my mind.
Now with a holy host of others standing round me, still I'm on the dark side of the moon.
And it seems like it goes on like this forever, you must forgive me
if I'm up and gone to Carolina in my mind.
In my mind I'm going to Carolina. Can't you see the sunshine, can't you just feel the moonshine?
Ain't it just like a friend of mine to hit me from behind? Yes, I'm gone to Carolina in my mind.
Gotta make it back home again soon, gotta make it back on home again soon,
gotta make it back to Carolina soon, can't hang around, no babe, gotta make it back home again,
gotta make it back to Carolina soon...
YAY, only a patch needed 🙂
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I was relieved!
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“I just carry on regardless with the verses I do know” – same! 🤣
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I liked that line, too!
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Love that you still hear your father’s voice in your head! It’s great when you can see things from a new perspective.
True story, when my BP was too high my doctor told me to sing at the top of my lungs when I felt stressed. Apparently, it stimulates and resets the vagus nerve, causing you to relax. I love to sing! You don’t have to sing well, just loudly. 😉
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Love this–I will definitely try it!
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That’s such a cool remedy! Thanks for sharing!!
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Your dad and mine seem like kindred spirits. I’m glad they’re still with us—just in a different way now.
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I wondered if I would ever forget the sound and tone of his voice. Thankfully, I still hear it.
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I love that. 💜
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Another well written thoughtful essay – I do enjoy them, to be honest not the music so much – James Taylor’s thin high pitched whiny voice? Nah…
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Lol! You’re not the only one that’s mentioned to me that they are not a fan of Taylor! I get it, he’s not everybody’s cup of tea!
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Car dealers should ask God for forgiveness because they’re all going to hell!
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I started the process of working directly with dealers. Many were ok, but I had my share of slimy ones. A friend recommended a car broker. This guy has connections with many of the car dealerships in the area and negotiated directly with all of them. He was able to get a better price than I could direct, at no cost to me. They even delivered the car to my front door! It was a really good experience!
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Awesome! I am glad you had a great experience.
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Nice song! I thought the song belonged to John Denver.
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Your Dad’s words is giving me something to think about too.
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