My wife had to stay in Hawaii due to a family emergency and I flew back solo. I sat watching people pass me wondering who was going to squeeze into the open seat next to me. A few huge muscle bound guys approached and I sighed with relief as they kept walking. I just looked down and hoped for the best.
Years ago I attended a meeting in New Orleans. It was a full return flight with the exception of an empty seat next to me. I was hopeful nobody would claim it. Then I saw a ragged drunk guy stumble down the aisle precariously holding a Big Gulped sized styrofoam cup of gumbo. Holy f*ck. As he got closer, I had no doubt he’d sit next to me. And he did. I had to suffer the smell of gumbo, B.O. and alcohol the entire flight, praying he didn’t puke on me.
Remembering this, I figured I’d already done my airline penance for the ill shit I’ve done in my lifetime. I looked up and the aisle was clear, but I didn’t want to jinx myself and celebrate until we were wheels up. I let out a sigh of relief when I heard the sound that they were safely tucked away. Thank god. I enjoyed the extra space for the five hour flight home.
Better than Ezra formed at Louisiana State University and was based in New Orleans. They released The King of New Orleans in 1996. It was a song about the homeless kids in the French Quarter who were known as gutter punks.
“I saw this one kid who was really charismatic, and I could tell he was kind of a leader among all the kids, the gutter punks, so I made him into this fictional kind of a Peter Pan-esque guy, and these kids were the Lost Boys and called him the King of New Orleans – I made up this story about him. That was what ‘King of New Orleans’ was about: trying to write the story about these kids and where they came from and where they were going.”
Those are real gutter punks in the video, which was shot on their turf . . . “The happy ending is there was this beautiful girl in the video with these dreds and these amazing tattoos. She did the video and then we lost touch with her. Then it was maybe 10 years later, she came to a show and she looked great, and she was married and just a normal girl. She was having a kind of wild time in the Quarter living on the streets at one point in her life.”
I won’t go as far as to say that guy who sat next to me on the plane was a gutter punk. He didn’t look the part. But if you blindfolded me and I had to make a judgement call solely on odor alone, well yeah, I may say otherwise.
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Got an angel on the stairs
As if you'd even care
When the lights are up
And the sun had nearly gone down
Did you see him on the street?
Did you pass him at your feet?
Did you think at all, "How dare they even look me in the eye"?
And he loves the girls
And he loves the boys
Going to make twenty dollars
Before the weekend's over
So set him up
To let him fall
Turn him over in your hands
God save the King of New Orleans
Got a ticket to a show
Going to see him take a blow
When the drunk one said
"Cat Stevens was the greatest singer!"
And did you kick him in the head?
Did you see the blood run down?
Did you laugh at all, when the people walked right by and said aloud
"Gutter punks are all the same"?
Probably make twenty dollars 'fore the weekend's over
So set him up
Then let him fall
Turn him over in your hands
God save the King of New Orleans
Set him up
Then let him fall
Turn him over in your hands
God save the King of New Orleans
Radio in my head
Radio in that car
Going down again
He's going down again
Anyway you look
Anyway you talk it over
It's easier
To let it slip out of your mind
But it rips your heart out
Then it kicks your head in
Just give him one more chance
Try to see the beauty in his world
All the way in on my hands in on my feet and shoulders
Going to make twenty dollars before the weekend's over
So set him up
Then let him fall
Turn him over in your hands
God save the King of New Orleans
Set him up
Then let him fall
Turn him over in your hands
God save the King of all New Orleans
God save the King of New Orleans
I don’t know which one is worse to sit next to — big person who invade your personal space, or someone with an offensive smell.
I mean, it is uncomfortable to sit in a cramped windows seat, but I sat on a 12 hr flight next to someone with horrible halitosis. It wasn’t fun. They did not need to speak to me, I can smell them BREATHE. And this is before covid where it is normal for people to wear face mask.
Nowadays, I wear facemask when flying as a pre-emptive measure.
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Oh gad…. I feel your pain. That sounds awful.
What I didn’t mention, was the guy in front of me leaned his chair all the way back. Which is his right, but he kept trying to move the chair back even more than it would go. All I could think of is WTF. I’m fine with the lean, it’s his right. But that little extra push kept hitting my knees. It made me wonder if it was intentional. Yet I just blew it off and didn’t make a fuss.
As a side note, he was wearing Notre Dame gear and I was wearing a polo with my university on it, which is a rival to ND. I couldn’t help think that could have been the inspiration behind the shenanigans. But I will say, I know a few ND alumni and they are all stand up decent people who enjoy the rivalry as much as I do. So I dismissed this explanation. But there are always a few bad apples…. More of a side note than I thought it was going to be. Thanks for indulging me. Lol
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I actually have a good story to tell about someone sending this to me once I’m an airplane. I had a guy sit next to me, he was in the military. He was about my height, but clearly in better shape than I was. During the flight, I watched him scrunch shoulders together, bend over a little bit in the chair to the point that he had plenty of extra space in his seat. I puresume he was able to do this after spending a lot of time on personal carriers. I don’t think he slept, but it was almost like he went into a meditative type state for the duration of the flight.
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That’s pretty interesting. I’m trying to imagine it…
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Funny memory. NOLA debauchery should stay in the French Quarter and never board an aircraft! I want to see the video but it seems only a still photo now. 😕
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Yeah, I looked for the video because I was really curious. Unfortunately, I couldn’t find it. I was curious what the kids looked like.
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Same! Oh well.
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Haha…I’m glad you enjoyed the extra space! I can’t stand bad smell either! Here’s a funny story. Years ago, I asked a young woman about my age at the time if she would switch seats with me so I could sit next to my sister. She kindly agreed. Unfortunately, a few hours later, the man who I was supposed to be sitting next to ended up next to her. He slept and snored so loudly the whole time. It was an eight-hour flight from Atlanta to Charles de Gaulle. I felt bad for her, but I have to admit, I was glad I escaped that seat. LOL
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You dodged a bullet! I do feel bad for her. But at the end of the day, it’s Russian roulette who sits next to you
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I’m sure that was her last mistake in switching seats with someone else. We all learn from mistakes. Don’t we?
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OMG, that is the worst nightmare flight! The worst we’ve had in recent memory was a big manspreading fella. Glad you were the beneficiary of an empty seat this time. And I hope the family emergency has a good outcome.
Not being GenX, I appreciate the mix of music you share. Some of it is familiar, some not. And your stories just keep getting better.
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Manspreading… I’ve never heard that term but I totally can imagine it. It’s such a good descriptor!
Thanks for your kind comment. I never knew they were from New Orleans, so it was pretty cool for me learn when I started searching for a song that I grew up with. And I’ll add, “Right back atcha!” I’ve enjoyed learning about Canadian music from your blog. And I appreciate your personalized touch!
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Well, you’re welcome and thank you kindly for the mutual mutuality!
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Reason number 11,246 for why I no longer fly. Love the 4 walls of my car, a super loud satellite radio, and the time to release all of life’s tensions. When I get bored I talk to Siri (male, British). Next planned trip–Toronto–can’t wait! It’s all good.
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Nothing like a good road trip! It’s easier to stretch out the old legs when I need it. Have a great time in Toronto! Hope it’s not too cold when you go!
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