Blackjack is all about feel.
I like a table full of nice people. Chatty people are good, but also people who have the EQ to know when not to be. And nobody wants angry guy at the table. It’s even worse when he’s angry drunk guy. It’s just bad juju and even worse karma.
When I’m on an incredible run, there is a sense of invincibility. The dealer is showing ten, I have sixteen, there’s no doubt in my mind I’m going to hit five to make twenty one. OK, not always a five, sometimes a four. I’ll never complain about twenty. Still probably a winner. These runs don’t happen very often, but when they do, they’re electric.
I love the feeling of anticipation and high drama. When I double down, please don’t immediately show me the card. I ask the dealer to deal it face down. Show it to me at the end. There is an excitement not knowing which way my luck will fall.
But there is also the other feels in the opposite direction. Like when I can’t pull a card if my life depended on it. I double down on eleven, only to get a deuce. I get twenty one, but so does the dealer. I typically don’t mind pushing, but what the hell? There are times I keep seeing sixteens hand after hand. Ugh. Man, the feeling can really swing in the other direction quickly.
One of the bad feels I get is when I buy in with the last remaining dollars from my wallet. Nothing is heavier than an empty wallet at the blackjack table at 4 am. I no longer have a buffer and I feel this sense of desperation. I know it sounds crazy, but occasionally I’ve gone back to the well. I stop by the ATM or use my credit cards to put a few dollars in my pocket. They’re just placeholders, though. I have no intention of buying back in with them. I only need to feel that my pockets aren’t empty. And like magic, the feeling that I’m down to my last buck is completely erased.
So when today’s prompt asked about an unlimited budget, Las Vegas came to mind. There’s no better feeling than being flushed with cash in Vegas. And as I read back what I wrote, I am a little concerned because it sounds like I have a serious gambling problem. Rest assured, I don’t. That was the old me, in my twenties and thirties. And I wasn’t playing big stakes back then, either. It’s all relative. I’ve become more responsible in my old age and realize I work too damn hard to squander it all at the tables. But I have to admit, I did feel a little bit of adrenaline writing this post.
The Cocteau Twins released Heaven or Las Vegas in 1990. I’ve liked the band since I was younger, but only discovered this song a few years ago. I like the vibe of the song, but had difficulty making out the lyrics. Seems like I wasn’t the only one.
I’ve no idea what she’s on about but what a glorious noise.
YouTube comment by manfred747
Ok, I am losing my mind. I thought she was singing in another language. I just googled the lyrics and it is in fact, english words being sung. I’m officially obsessed with this song.
YouTube comment by alextthomas
Elizabeth Fraser sings in her own language. I don’t understand a word she’s singing but I feel it deep, deep, deep inside.
YouTube comment by merlebuck
Cocteau Twins: proof lyrics don’t matter when the voice is an instrument in its own right.
YouTube comment by Guy_de_Loimbard
Just like blackjack, sometimes it’s just about the feel…
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Who'll ever win?
Gee, you're just so ephemeral
Go back for new
For new in vain, it failed
Singing on the famous street
I want to love a boy that won't love me
Am I just in heaven or Las Vegas
That's why it is more brighter than the sun is to me
He's a hustler
It's a role, he'll never make a suit
Hang on to this
So stay and spin and fail and fail
Who'll ever win?
Gee, you're just so ephemeral
Go back for new
For new in vain, it failed
Singing on the famous street
I want to love a boy that won't love me
Am I just in heaven or Las Vegas
That's why it is more brighter than the sun is to me
Reaching this itch in my soul
That's like any old playing card
It must be why I'm thinking of Las Vegas
Why it's more brighter than the sun is to me
Furthermore, let's blast it off
I'm dizzy so I go under the Big Dipper
Come fantasy for a carnival
I'm empty before our wedding
Singing on the famous street
I want to love a boy that won't love me
Am I just in heaven or Las Vegas
That's why it is more brighter than the sun is to me
Reaching this itch in my soul
That's like any old playing card
It must be why I'm thinking of Las Vegas
Why it's more brighter than the sun is to me
Maybe there, while you was rail
I'll go in and seize your heart and be personal
I suspect I'm singing to you a tune
And still you find the beat and sing it to you soon
I’ve never really been much of a card player.
And for what most people consider gambling, I need to find a different term. The word “gamble“ implies that there is at least a small chance that you can win. When I gamble, there is ZERO possibility of me winning!
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