My Gen X Playlist: Moving Out – Billy Joel

MaryG from 50 Happens wrote about her son’s first job and leaving the nest. It made me think about the time I moved out.

When I graduated college and got my first job, my dad approached me with a pretty sound proposition. Live at home and he wouldn’t impose any rules. Pay monthly rent, that would be deposited into a separate bank account with 100% returned to me when I was ready to buy a place. So smart. So wise. Damn, what a deal.

My buddies and I had already been looking for an apartment, though. The thought of getting our own place had too much gravitational pull. It really didn’t make financial sense to move out. Student loans, credit card debt, an entry level job that didn’t pay squat. When you’re young, it’s easy to put blinders on and dive in head first and worry about the details later.

At that time, I didn’t know what I wanted to be when I grew up. Don’t laugh. I still struggle with this question even today. What I did know was I had to venture into the world without a compass to experience being a stupid twenty something, living by trial and error. And error. And error.

Sitting on the couch, eating burgers, talking shit to your buddies while playing Sega hockey, music blasting in the background while cracking open a cheap cold beer doesn’t sound like the time of your life. Believe it or not, in that moment, it was. And somehow, there are times that I’d give anything to relive those days. I know nostalgia is all about selective memory, making you forget about the pain and struggle. I’m no fool, I know that’s what’s happening right now. But I’m glad I took the plunge headfirst into adulthood. If I hadn’t, I’m not sure how my life would have turned out today.

Mary wrote something that really hit home.

In addition to independence, I think it gives people motivation. You don’t really know what you value and want most in life until you’re paying all your own bills.

Remembering her own experience must have made it easier to give her son the nudge out the door. I commend her for that. It’s so much better allowing him room to become independent instead of being a hovering parent. While I understand wanting to remain close and involved is motivated by love, it also could stifle his ability to stand on his own two feet. Still, I imagine self-accelerating empty nesthood couldn’t have been easy. I commented on her blog that her son’s future wife will thank her for it.

I was surprised I knew a song that might actually fit. Billy Joel released Moving Out in 1977. That’s was way back in the 70’s and under slightly different circumstances.

The lyrics refer to the New York working-class immigrant masculine ethos, in which wage-earners take pride at working long hours to afford the outwards signs of having “made it” in America.

In 2014, Joel told Howard Stern: “I’ve seen friends of mine who were pressured into taking a job to take care of the family, and then they never fulfill themselves – they’re doing it because that’s where you’re supposed to go. Everybody’s got something they love to do or they should be doing – a talent. I see people wasting their lives, not putting their talent to that purpose so they could have stuff: you get a Cadillac and then you’re fine.”

Songfacts

So that’s a different take on moving out and I see some truth in Joel’s words. There is this push pull about making a living or following your passion. Could they ever be one and the same? If you find yourself nodding your heard yes, cheers to you if you’ve found it. You’re living the dream. I wish I could nod along with you.

People ask me if I love what I do. There are certain aspects of my role that I do feel satisfaction. If I’m being honest, I don’t love it at all. The problem is, I’ve been doing it for such a long time, I’ve become good at it. And there’s where the handcuffs lie.

If I knew what my passion was, then maybe I’d be able to formulate a transition plan. But I don’t really. Like I said before, I still struggle with figuring out what I want to be when I grow up. I think as I approach retirement, I’ll have more flexibility to try out new things. Things that have been specks of interest that I’ve never had the time nor energy to dip my toe in and try.

I’m thinking about Mary’s words some more. What do I value and want most in life. Although the answer changes with life’s seasons, these last few years it’s been pretty clear. Time. I’d love more time. And since that’s a tall order, I’m making a more concerted effort to make the most of what I have now. As I write this, I’m sitting in a hotel lobby in Chicago. My first time here. It’s been on my list of places to go and I’m an unabashed tourist. Yesterday we toured the city. What a great vibe. Today is the Art Institute of Chicago and Chicago deep dish pizza. We are already bouncing around ideas for our next trip. It’s nice to step out of our normal lives once in awhile and enjoy the new scenery. Hopefully this is one of many more to come.

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For a complete playlist, please click here.

For the Spotify playlist, please click here.

Hoo-ooh
Oh-oh
Mm-mm

Anthony works in the grocery store
Savin' his pennies for some day
Mama Leone left a note on the door
She said, "Sonny, move out to the country"
Ah but workin' too hard can give you a heart attack
Ack-ack-ack-ack-ack

You oughta know by now
(You oughta know by now)
Who needs a house out in Hackensack?
Is that all you get for your money?

And it seems such a waste of time
If that's what it's all about
Mama, if that's movin' up then I'm movin' out
I'm movin' out, mm mm
Ooh-ooh, uh-huh, mm

Sergeant O'Leary is walkin' the beat
At night he becomes a bartender
He works at Mr. Cacciatore's
Down on Sullivan Street
Across from the medical center
Yeah, and he's tradin' in his Chevy
For a Cadillac-ac-ac-ac-ac-ac

You oughta know by now
(You oughta know by now)
And if he can't drive with a broken back
At least he can polish the fenders

And it seems such a waste of time
If that's what it's all about
Mama, if that's movin' up then I'm movin' out
Mm, I'm movin' out
Oh-oh, ooh ooh, uh-huh, mm

You should never argue
With a crazy mind-mind-mind-mind-mind-mind

You oughta know by now
(You oughta know by now)
You can pay Uncle Sam with the overtime
Is that all you get for your money?

And if that's what you have in mind
Yeah, if that's what you're all about
Good luck movin' up, 'cause I'm movin' out
I'm movin' out

I'm movin' out